Deep thought.

Has it ever happend to you...you know when you just stop and think about the world around you, the world beside you, and the world that involves you. Today was one of those days for me one of those days where you think too much, it's one of those days where reality catches up to you and all the things you don't want to think about you think about.

1-Job- I quit my job at Mcdonalds, but hopefully moving to a easier and more enjoyable job in a electronics department at a nearbye superstore.

*evil thoughts*
Thinking about work makes me think about school, am I going to colledge...if so what courses, what will these do for me? will I stay in my home city? will I move? will I end up being screwed over for money due to my lazyness to not get any grants? are there any scholarships out there for Graphic Designers of my skill level? If I do ever become a designer will I really enjoy it? am I even good enough to be a designer? Will I end up droping a course moved somehwere I dont know... with nowhere to go?

2-School-I plan on going back to school for grade 13 *I did graduate but I want to get my Japanese while it's cheap* I like Japanese it's a great language and I would love to visit or maybe even live there someday.

*evil thoughts*
Do I have the dedication to learn a second language...I suck at the one I speak as it it...How will going to school effect me working full time? Where do I plan on going with a second language will it open door or just help keep some ajar?

Days like this make me ramble on, but I hate rambling when I got no one to ramble to...so I guess this is why I have a blog hopefully someone will read my ramblings and take something intelligable from them. I assume the day after I wright this I will go back to my happy go lucky self and read this and wonder why I am worrying about things like this ^^; part of it is the people around me don't seem to embrace the layed back lifestyle I want to live.

I have also discovered how horrible people think life is, I personally think if I can do something I enjoy...whatever it is as long as I can make a living even if it's only a mediocer one I would rather do that then another job I despise but get payed more. Work is like a part of life for me, we spend enough time doing it...why not enjoy it eh?

People think differently, they think you have to work hard on something you hate to be able to squeeze that good life when your not working...it strikes me as odd how people can even think this, in a land like Canada where there is soo much opertunity waiting for the individual how can we think we have to dislike our jobs to be a good job, and that job we love is out of our grasp! Obviously my look on life is a tad utopianist, but others seems a tad...deperessing and well wrong to me at least.

What do you think life should be like, should it be a eternal struggle to acheive happyness while your not working, or should it be something you enjoy even if it doesnt give as many benifits as working with what you hate?

I hate days like this they get me depressed at the fact I even think about this, makes me think all the dark thoughts I don't want to think and no one should think. It makes you look at the world around you and see all the things wrong with it instead of looking at what is right, depending on perspective the world can be a beatifull or horid place, so before I ramble on anymore I'll stop.

*and yes still trying to get those RL pics on my PC*